i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
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I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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