whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
