i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize