For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
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