theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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