Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Randomize
