oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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