Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
