guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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