Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Randomize
