I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
