i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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