It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize