Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I love you. Go after that dick
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize