i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
