Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
