no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
