no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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