You work out of a Hotel?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
do nipples grow back?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
