hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
