I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I showed him my bush... on skype.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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