I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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