We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
