Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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