I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
