Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
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Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
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I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize