ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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