He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
