All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
