I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
