Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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