that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
