....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
