hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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