There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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