I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize