Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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