I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
