forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
