Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
