I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Floor bacon is actually really good
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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