Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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