Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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