OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
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no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
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I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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