There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize