I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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