Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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