No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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