clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
