I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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