Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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