He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize